The Trap of Anticipation

I can’t say that I’m a wholehearted supporter of “South Park,” but of the handful of episodes I’ve seen, one stands out for its diamond-sharp observation of how we miss out on life by not being present. You didn’t know “South Park” could be so deep? Well, read on.

In the famed “Towelie,” the boys get the gaming system of their dreams—the Okama Gamesphere—and spend a whole weekend playing. Then the gaming system is stolen by the federal government, and a hunt to retrieve it ensues. The boys face increasingly dangerous situations as they stay focused on their one goal: get that gaming system back! They encounter aliens and dodge army-alien shoot-outs as they pursue their goal. The obvious irony is that the boys are essentially living out one of the video games they love to play, but they don’t realize it and can’t appreciate it because they are focused on retrieving the imitation instead of experiencing the real thing.

Now, I’m sure that the writers weren’t trying to make a statement about presence and awareness; they were most likely poking fun at people who become so addicted to gaming that they forget to live real lives. But aren’t these ideas essentially dealing with the same issue?

This is the trap of anticipation. Daily, ordinary life loses its luster when compared to the excitement of a fantasy world. Gaming is just one example of millions; it could also be reading a great book or slogging through the day so you can get to a wonderful dinner with friends. Each of these activities is innocuous in itself; it’s the anticipation of them that causes us to miss out on what is actually happening around us.

This is particularly true during the holidays. I remember being a little kid, too excited to sleep on Christmas Eve because I was anticipating what presents I’d get to rip open in morning. On the one hand, there’s something sweet about a child’s excitement; on the other hand, it ruined a night’s sleep! The flipside of this is anticipating yearly family conflict around the holiday dinner table, which can ruin sleep as well as waking hours. And don’t get me started on how the anticipation of getting great deals causes Black Friday shoppers to act abominably toward their fellow beloved, precious human beings…

I have a bumper sticker in my mind that reads, “While you were waiting for your life to happen, it happened.” Your life is happening at all moments – not just the ones you’re excited about. Not just the fantasy future moments that you believe will make your life better.

We have grown accustomed to anticipation because we have not been taught that the present moment is the only one that exists, and that it is beautiful and whole. If you can take up the practice of being still, even for 15 minutes a day, you will begin to feel—even just for a few seconds at a time—the eternal presence of God and his eternal NOW. You will get feeling-glimpses of the holiness, the radiant beauty, of just existing. In those moments, you aren’t waiting for something to happen; you ARE happening. And it is enough. There’s no need to spin up excitement about the next great thing on the horizon, because there’s nothing better than being present.

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