Book Review: How to Determine the Enneagram Personality Type of Others

Knowing the Enneagram is supremely helpful in all areas of life, particularly within the realm of personal relationships. Understanding your own type and that of others fosters compassion and better communication. It’s a fantastic relationship tool.

Josen Kalra understands this well, which prompted him to write the slim volume, How to Determine the Enneagram Personality Type of Others. During training courses, he found that he was good at sorting out others’ types – both people in real life and characters in film. He saw that classmates had a harder time accurately typing others, so he thought he’d share his insights.

The book begins with the story of how Josen learned the Enneagram and a brief, high-level overview of the system. This book is not for people who have never heard of this model of human behavior; you need to know type distinctives in order to make proper observations and ask the right questions.

Then each Enneagram type gets its own chapter with highlights of that type and bullet points that can be turned into questions to ask people. For instance, “Ones experience themselves as good people, trying to do what is correct, just or moral.” So, you would ask someone whose type you’re trying to figure out, “Do you think of yourself as a good person?” and “Do you try to do what is correct, just or moral?”

The tricky thing here, though, is that most people would say yes to both of these. Psychology has taught us that we think of ourselves more highly than others tend to. And few would admit that we don’t always try to do what is correct, just or moral.

I would modify this question, then, to emphasize degrees. “How often do you think about doing what is correct, just or moral?” or “What percentage of your mental energy is focused on doing what is correct, just or moral?” A One will most likely report a high percentage.

You can also watch their face and listen to their tone as well as their word choice for clues. Josen talks about looking for instances when a question energizes someone – riles them up or gets them excited. A One is likely to draw themselves up and earnestly answer this question in the affirmative. They may even look haughty, with an “Of course!” tone in their voice.

The bit I liked best was in the last chapter, “Doing a Typing Interview.” He writes about “learning to follow,” where you gently probe further as you listen to your interviewee’s responses. “The reason we follow is to dig deeper into what they are feeling when they identify with a statement or question…when you notice someone’s energy pick up, that is when you want to follow him.” Ask more specific questions about that topic as a way to narrow down type.

If you are a long-standing student of the Enneagram, I don’t know that this book is for you. It seems to be directed at those who have a beginning knowledge of the model but are having trouble typing others.

And I will reiterate here that it’s not your job or anyone else’s to tell someone their type. This robs them of their own self-discovery journey and may not be accurate. Certain types look alike on the surface. It’s useful to know, though, in relationships; you just don’t need to tell the other person what their type is. I think Josen would agree with me on this.

A fun little aside is that soon after I started reading the book, I knew Josen was a Type Five. He aptly fulfills the title of his type, The Observer. That’s why he’s good at determining type. I could tell by the language he used and his writing style. In short, if you know what to look for, type gives itself away in a hundred little ways.

You can pick up a copy of the book here. And I’d love to hear in the comments your experiences with trying to type others! Easy? Hard? Confusing? What’s helped you?

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